CHANGE is important in Relationships

The insecurity which often grows drastically without your knowledge, overtaking your common sense.

Thank you for choosing to read this article. If you like it, please share it with the people you care and love. It’s a fact that many of us tend to overlook the truth of life. At times, we just need a little push to get back on track and this article just does that. Be patient. Be considerate.

Let’s start with a few questions but I would suggest you to be honest with your answers. If you’re unsure about answering them to the point, that’s okay. Do you like someone? Are you in love with someone? Are you afraid that your family or friends might walk away from you? Are you afraid that the person you love might walk away despite all your efforts? Are you scared of losing the people you love?

Note down your answers. Familiarize yourself with the reasons you’re afraid of. Life isn’t just about one person, it’s a series of events with the people you love which is filled with emotions, feelings, actions, reactions, and your thoughts. It’s good to explore life. I could have written all the aspects to cover the definition of “life” but I think you got the point.

It is evident that one of the best pleasures in the world is being with someone you love, to be with someone you feel comfortable, and to be with someone you can trust.

The moment we understand and realize that we trust someone, we end up sharing our past with them. We assume that the person will not share any such information about us. Does that always work? No right?. Why? Have you ever asked this to yourself?

We meet so many people in our life. We always thrive to get what we want. It doesn’t matter if it’s really needed or not. Sometimes, we don’t act mature and end up with the things which are really not needed to us after a lot of effort. Similarly, it does require a lot of effort to maintain a healthy relationship with someone you love. Wouldn’t it be a paradise if you have found everything you ever wanted? Trust me, relationships won’t work that way. Relationships are not meant to create a paradise for you. They are not a bowl of different flavors of candies in it so that you taste whenever you want to and ignore it until you urge for it again. Sometimes, despite all your efforts and compromises people WILL walk away from you. This is a painful TRUTH. It hurts a lot seeing that person walking away from you for whom you have compromised with almost everything in your life.

You should always remember that people have a different perspective about certain places and different types of conversations. It is very important in every relationship that you respect each other’s privacy no matter how strong it is deep-rooted.

Take timeout to analyze why your relationships did not work. Try to gather as many reasons, conclusions, statements, comments, or whatsoever you find it useful to justify your claim. I know that you have a different perspective for this and a lot of questions must have raised already, but that’s okay. A little progress is a good progress.

It is always observed that we don’t appreciate the efforts of our loved ones. In fact, we ignore or choose not to focus on them. We are easily distracted towards the items we don’t own. We are known in building an urge to collect all the items we ever watch or read about. Doesn’t matter if it’s necessary as long as we are capable of fulfilling our desire. Our desire with the fast changing world will only grow with time. Affection towards gadgets are prioritized over connecting with other human beings. But do we ever take a pause and think on our journey? Where are we actually heading? Is this how the modern world would emerge as? As a selfish inhabitant on earth?

Every relationship brings a lot of positivity and negativity with it. Remember that change is inevitable and so are the pain and pleasures. It’s up to an individual how to manage the relationships over a changing period of time.

And the pain you feel, it is good. Pain will help you grow. Pain helps you stay alert and in track. Pain enlightens you about the importance of joy. Trust me, that’s okay.

It is evident that we are afraid of losing our loved ones and that helps in understanding the need to fulfil wishes but it is impossible to fulfil every demand or wish in every committed relationship. But when you hear your loved ones complaining about every missing element in the relationship, you may feel scared and worry that they would walk away from you. Such uncleared doubts create several such questions which can make you doubt your own beliefs and your trust in them. If you have already experienced it then you must be scared already, aren’t you?. You may end up overthinking and start compromising with your needs to fulfil their requirements. It is necessary to care, love, and trust in every relationship. Sometimes, the fear alerts you NOT to encourage anything that would spoil or question your relationships.

Fear of losing someone is important for every individual in every relationship. It will alert you to stay away from doing anything which could hurt your loved ones. However, the fear should be controlled and monitored. It is essential to understand the needs of your loved ones but that doesn’t mean that you lose yourself. Fear of losing your loved ones will increase when you often hear them complaining that they aren’t happy with your efforts. Now, that doesn’t mean that you rush to fulfil every NEED when it is impossible. It’s your call to investigate why they aren’t happy before you rush and consider any hasty steps which could ruin it later. Fear of losing someone who loves you, should be investigated. This is a sign indicating you that it needs your attention and you need to resolve it else it may escalate and hurt you and the people you love.

Sometimes, people fail to understand that every relationship is filled with positivity and negativity. Some of them only focus on positive and happy moments and don’t want to be involved in negative or worst situations. It’s a risky step if you are choosing to be involved with such people without resolving such expectations or mindset. It may cause you an irrevocable pain.

These kinds of people will only care about their feelings and needs. If you compromise even when you are doing everything you should, it will never be sufficient to them. The fear of losing someone who never cared about you is a sign that you need a different perspective to look at the situation. A different thought process to understand your responsibilities. Not every relationship is a SUNSHINE but it can SHINE when two people burn their negative unclear thoughts and focus on the areas of improvements. It doesn’t mean that you force the other when they are NOT willing to participate. In such cases, you need to change.

Change is important in life and in relationships. Does that mean a green signal to change relationships due to worst situations or change the thinking for healthy relationships during worst situations? In my next article, I will talk about the various problems and how they will spoil the relationship when people are preoccupied with their expectations without proper communication.